Tuesday, January 06, 2009

Ann Coulter: Fashion Diva

Should a prematurely aging bleach blonde in her late forties, who hasn't had a decent haircut nor worn a skirt below crotch-level in nearly thirty years, really be allowed to discuss someone else's sense of fashion?

Oh, well, unlike Michelle Obama, people will never mistake Ann Coulter for Jackie O., or Cindy McCain, or Michelle Obama in either her fashion or her manners. All three of the aforementioned exhibited the ability to dress in tasteful styles that were both flattering and age-appropriate, and could conduct themselves with reasonable decorum in public. Coulter, on the other hand, still looks like a hooker at Mardi Gras. An OLD hooker at Mardi Gras at that.

Ann, go home, wash your face, learn how to use a good moisturizer (with sunscreen, for God's sake), some decent quality make-up (hint: pale lipstick on women over thirty is always a bad, bad call), get some skirts that hide those gnarly, hideous knees and cut that stringy mop you call hair. Then, maybe, after you stop looking like a crack whore whose been working the boulevard long past her prime, then you can start critiquing other people's style and appearance. Oh, and, about your book? Let me just tell you that there is nothing more pathetic than a "never-was" desperately trying not to become a "has-been."



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